


Yami to Ai

by LittleGirlMurder



Category: Naruto
Genre: (a little too well), Alternate Universe - Twins, BAMF Uzumaki Naruto, Codependency, Mental Instability, This is what happens when you force kids to be your scapegoats, Twins actually getting along, Unhealthy Relationships, Uzumaki Naruto Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:14:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27401035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleGirlMurder/pseuds/LittleGirlMurder
Summary: "Light cannot love: it is too bright. Darkness cannot love: it is too barren."Noa Uzumaki is everything Naruto is not; he's cold, cruel and pitiless. Something dark burns in him, threatening to swallow his very soul entirely. Life as a human sacrifice is not easy and Noa... Noa is nothing like his twin.
Relationships: Uzumaki Naruto & Uzumaki Noa
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This whole fic is based on that scene from the Waterfall of Truth, where Naruto met his dark self.

**There was a legend among the Uzumaki.**

**A legend about two twins that would one day be born into the Uzumaki clan. One would be born with golden hair and blue eyes, and his soul mostly light. The other would be born with raven hair and red eyes, and his soul mostly darkness. They would always stay together, for the light and darkness must always be in balance. Never to overtake the other. And neither shall either of them know love when they are apart.**

**Light cannot love: it is too bright.**

**Darkness cannot love: it is too barren.**

**Only together are they truly complete.**

* * *

Kushina Uzumaki never dreamt that she would be the mother of the twins from her family's legend. She never even dreamt she'd be mother to _twins;_ the younger had been a surprise. She loved them both nonetheless.

She loved them with all her heart and protected them with her dying breath. As a mother should.

Her very last words to them were thus:

'Naruto... Noa... protect each other... always stay together... no matter what...'

Kushina Uzumaki died knowing the hard road that was ahead for her darling children; she died weeping at the thought of not being there to support them.

* * *

Naruto and Noa grew up caring only about each other. How could they not? The other villagers despised them, hissing insults as soon as one of them walked by. The other children stayed away at their parents urging, or bullied and ostracised them to gain approval. The Uzumaki twins were utterly isolated, but together. Always together. They clung to each other as tightly as a drowning man does to a raft.

Once, Naruto had been locked out of the orphanage for an entire night. He had spent it beneath a tree outside the building, shivering miserably. He nearly died from the biting cold.

The ninjas didn't care. The villagers rejoiced.

Noa rushed outside the instant the doors were unlocked at dawn light.

'Naruto?' he swivelled his head around wildly.

A tiny figure was huddled beneath the big tree just beside the building. Noa gasped, fear and concern intermingling. He ran over to his twin and began shaking his shoulders. Naruto's eyes were unfocused, staring in no particular direction. His breath was slow, his body cold. Noa's red eyes were wide with worry.

The raven haired boy pulled his twin inside, through the empty corridors and into the kitchen. It was warm there, and blessedly free of people. The kitchen was always empty this early in the morning, which Noa was very thankful for. It meant no one would disturb them, or try to kick them out. Noa sat his twin carefully into a chair in the warmest spot in the room.

Naruto was nearly blue all over, trembling weakly and completely unresponsive. His normally-bright blue eyes were glassy and staring. The boy only stirred when Noa drew a blanket or two around him and pushed a mug of something hot in his tiny hands. Staring worriedly at his twin, the raven sat close with his arms around him. Slowly, bit by bit, the blonde came to life.

'Th-thanks Noa...' Naruto whispered. Noa only nodded in response. The look on his face was unreadable.

* * *

**_That was the day Noa Uzumaki learned what hate was._ **

* * *

Naruto pushed the incident out of his mind. He forgot it ever happened, pushed it deep to the back of his mind. There it remained, locked away in his subconscious, never to see the light of day again. Naruto desperately denied the incident ever happened. Like he always did, with anything too terrible to think about.

Noa on the other hand, remembered clearly, perfectly. He fixed it all within his mind, kept it stored away in his bottomless memory. Sometimes, he could feel the cool darkness of his mother's womb. Sometimes, he could recall with perfect clarity the pain of birth, the cold air and the night. Noa remembered his father's seal, his mother's dying words.

_'Naruto... Noa... protect each other... always stay together... no matter what...'_

He remembered the callous dismissal of the adults of Naruto's being locked outside. He remembered the chill in his brother's skin, the frightening emptiness in his eyes.

Something burned in him, hot and bitter and wrathful. Red eyes filled steadily with an alien emotion. Noa didn't bother to hide it. In fact, he displayed it brazenly, proudly, for all to see. Villagers inhaled sharply as soon as they saw, ninja frowned and gave him and his twin a wide berth. A vicious satisfaction curled in the raven haired twin's heart. Voices whispered in his ears, in his dreams, in his every waking moment, in his very heart.

_better this way, if they wanna be afraid, GIVE them something to be afraid of, bastards, all of them..._

**hate them, hate them, hate them, kill, burn, maim, DESTROY...**

**_do it Noa, do it, you hate them, don't you want to see them SUFFER?_ **

_don't lie to yourself Noa_

**kill them kill them kill them**

* * *

There was something cruel in Noa, something unspeakably dark. Something his twin lacked.

Naruto lived in denial, buried himself under bold declarations and loud actions. Noa was quiet, contemplative, red eyes often straining to read under the cover of darkness. Naruto lacked the patience for reading. The Uzumaki twins were very, very different.

Naruto was a loudmouth.

Noa was quiet.

Naruto wore his heart on his sleeve.

Noa was reticent and secretive.

Naruto had blonde and blue.

Noa had black and red.

Most only looked at the surface, ignoring what was beneath. There was a defining difference that separated the twins very clearly, something far worse than merely hair colour or personality quirks.

Naruto was willing to forgive. Noa was not. And therein lay the true difference.


	2. Chapter 2

When the Uzumaki twins were given their very own apartment (even though they were really far too little to live on their own) -it had come as a relief. To everyone involved. The people running the orphanage had been glad to see the backs of "the demons", the kids were glad to get more space and the twins were glad to get away from everybody.

_better with just the two of us_

**we don't need them, do we Noa**

**_let's get away from here, away from THEM_ **

Neither of them had ever been stupid or naive enough to trust the "caretakers" at the orphanage, who would gladly stab them with painted smiles on their faces. And staying as far away from the other kids as possible was in their best interests. Neither of the twins minded all that much anymore. Noa had never held any desire to interact with anyone outside his brother and Naruto had rapidly cooled off from his desire to befriend them after a certain incident. (Noa hadn't joined his twin on that day and often puzzled over what could possibly have happened. Naruto never told him.)

Once they were no longer in the public eye 24/7, life started to get better. A little more bearable, at least. Noa could now spend as long as he liked curled up with a book, Naruto tended to his plants in peace. No more shivering in the cold by themselves, no more sleepless nights trying to get comfortable because the other kids kicked them out _(no more getting_ locked out _at night, Noa thought viciously)._

The apartment was cramped and lonely and a disaster zone on the best of days, but it was all they had. And it was much, much better than the orphanage.

* * *

Noa was the one who kept the apartment clean and adequately stocked. Naruto had little patience for household chores _(or indeed, little patience for anything he deemed "boring")_ so it fell the raven to keep everything in order. Surprisingly, Noa hadn't minded. He hated dirt or mess and a little cleaning was hardly the worst thing he's had to endure. The cleaning itself was tedious and a little mind-numbing, but bearable.

Stocking up the food was a tad bit more difficult.

Mostly due to the fact nobody would actually let either of the young twins _buy_ anything. The vendors and shopkeepers sneered and glared and turned them away with shouting and insults. The crowds of people whispered, the kids pointed and laughed. Naruto ignored it all. Noa seethed, sending everyone glares full of ice-cold hate.

As soon as they got home, Noa ran to the bathroom, slammed the door shut and collapsed onto his knees. With a choked gasp, he blinked back the tears stinging his red eyes. Tears of rage and pain and helplessness filled the lonely bathroom. The boy's tiny body shook with ragged sobs.

 _pea-brained_ _idiots, who the hell do they think they are_

**kill them, maim them, MAKE THEM SUFFER**

**_NOA NOA NOA NOA_ **

**NOA NOA NOA NOA**

_NOA NOA NOA NOA_

**_stop lying to yourself, darling Noa_ **

**_we only want to help you_ **

_hurt them Noa, the lady with the dog who spat on you, the fat vendor who threw you out, that kid who taunted you_

**kill her precious dog, throw it into a damn river, choke it in front of her eyes**

_she deserves it Noa, they all do_

Noa shook his head frantically, pressing his hands over his ears. (as if that would help. nothing ever blocked the voices out)

'I- I can't, I don't know-' he whimpered, voice hoarse, throat throbbing in pain.

 _you can, you can, they're just pathetic_ _civilians_

**use IT Noa, use it!**

_use it use it use it use it_

His whole body trembled. He was still on his knees, both legs slid in opposite directions, pressing himself lower. He bit his lip, his hands loosened their grip ever-so-slightly. As if sensing his hesitation, a third voice joined in to the mad chorus in the boy's head. It was soft and chiding and gentle. What Noa imagined a mother must be like. He knows nothing of real parents, of course, but what he's seen on the streets and read in tattered old volumes painted a clear enough picture.

Naruto would be so disappointed, Noa, you promised to make him real food today

The trembling eased, little by little. The boy breathed in ragged pants, exhausted. That voice was right, he did in fact, promise his brother exactly that. Noa wasn't exactly the world's best chef or anything, but his cooking was passable. Surprisingly so, for his age. (Out of simple necessity. Naruto can't cook to save his life, he doesn't even _think_ about stuff like that. Not like Noa does.)

That decides it. Noa can't disappoint his twin. He refuses to.

A series of loud THUMPS batter the bathroom door. The raven blinked owlishly, face still wet with tears. He turned to look at the door.

'OI! Noa!'

'Y-yes?' he asked hoarsely.

'How long are you staying there, I need to go IIIIN!' Naruto whined, rattling the doorknob insistently.

Noa let out a shaky laugh and got to his feet.

'Just a moment,' he said, amusement creeping into his tone.

The boy splashed some water on his face. It's cool and wet and calming against his skin, rubbing the tears away, washing the red-rim from his eyes. He determinedly began to scrub any evidence of his meltdown away. Naruto will never find out about this - whatever it even _is_. Not if Noa has anything to say about it.

That's right, he's what matters here, ignore them, they aren't worth your trouble

(Whoever, or whatever, the gentle voice is, Noa fully agreed with it. Those damn villagers hardly mattered when his twin was right there.)

He walked over to the door and pulled it open.


	3. Chapter 3

Whenever Naruto thought about it, he couldn't remember a time before Noa. They were twins, they were orphans and all alone against a village that hated them. That was simply the way it was. Always. And no matter what others may think, Naruto was no idiot. If there was anything he knew well, it was his brother.

If it were anyone else, he wouldn't have noticed.

_(they didn't deserve the real him)_

_(the world hated him, despised him, tried to crush him and his brother to their will, so it was the loud, brainless, dead-last that they got)_

If it were anyone else, he wouldn't have _cared._

_(nobody cared about Naruto; Naruto cared about nobody.)_

_(he wanted them to respect him, to notice him, to look at him and cheer his name_ _.)_

_(he never, ever, wanted them to die. that would just prove everybody right.)_

_(but that didn't mean he liked them either.)_

But this wasn't just anybody. This was Noa.

Noa, his twin brother who was always there. The one who pulled him out of the cold and made him food. It was often sloppy and burnt and clumsily made, but it was also warm and filling and Noa always insisted: _"Eat up, come on, you know they won't give us any."_ Noa was the only person who cared about him. Without him, Naruto would've been utterly alone. _(and wasn't that a terrifying thought. loneliness and desperation, eating away at him, wearing him down, until-)_

So when Noa rushed into the bathroom and slammed the door the instant they came back home, Naruto knew something was wrong.

Noa never reacted like _that_ to the villagers' scorn. He raged and hurt and screamed, yes, but he did so openly, obviously. Never hidden and alone and crying. This wasn't normal: and Naruto worried. After all, Noa may be the one who always took care of him, but he was the older twin! He should be the one protecting Noa!

Right now however, Noa didn't need protection. He needed a distraction.

So he slammed loudly, insistently on the door and yelled:

'OI! Noa!'

* * *

The raven haired twin stirred the simmering liquid and peered into the pot intently. Just a little more time, and it should be done. This recipe was a fairly simple one; one he had made plenty of times before. It was his go-to whenever their food was running low and neither of them felt up to the making the trip to the marketplace. _(not up to the whispers and staring and palpable hate)_ After all, Naruto liked it, he himself liked it, it was cheap and filling and easy to make. So they ate it often.

The chopping and stirring and measuring of portions was dull, easy work. It also made it harder for Noa to focus on his turbulent sea of negative emotions.

It was absurd. He and Naruto had made that trip dozens of times now. So why did this particular time sting so much? Countless incidents like that were scattered in the Uzumaki twins every day. He should have been used to it. Most would say he was overreacting. Most would say to get over it. 'Most' were also brainless, easily led, sheep-like, _idiots_.

In truth, that kind of treatment, the hostility and open hate... It wasn't something anybody could ever really get used to. Let alone get over.

_hate them, hate them, hate them_

**kill them, kill them, kill them**

Noa's fists clenched and trembled above the simmering pot. With a sudden gasp, he shook his head and loosened his fists. The ingredients clutched within fell into the pot.

* * *

At night, Noa's dreams were painted red. Sometimes he remembered snatches, sometimes a confusing jumble of things that didn't make sense. He remembered just enough to track some commonalities, though.

There was always blood in his dreams- red and bright, bright, bright. Hot and thick, with a sharp metallic tang.

Screaming and ripping and _whywhywhy._

Insidious voices, whispering and tempting and sickening.

Hateful whispers and looks; all snuffed out in a single moment.

_hate them, hate them, hate them_

**kill them, kill them, kill them**

**_they deserve it Noa, do it, let it out_ **

**_DO IT NOA, DO IT!_ **

**_DO IT!_ **

Dreams and nightmares and hate and eyes glowing red-

\- till a little boy woke up screaming, thrashing, tangled in the bed sheets. Sweaty and damp and scared.

He sat up, slowly untangling himself, heart still racing. Shivering and jumping at shadows, Noa pattered to the kitchen. His hands shook and glass clacked as he poured water into a cup. He sat at the table, bare feet high above the ground, hands clutching the glass of water. He sipped at it, eyes blankly staring into nothing.

Nights were difficult, to say the least.

During the day, he was okay. Well mostly. As long as he had his twin, who was bright and loud and cheerful. Naruto chased away the bad things, made their bleak reality a little less bleak. He was optimistic and determined and strong. Noa always felt safe when Naruto was near. Like their crappy life could be turned around and one day, he and Naruto would be known and respected and maybe even _loved_.

With his twin, Noa could pretend that he wasn't messed up in the head; that he didn't hear voices. He could ignore the fact that he had given the villagers _a reason_ to be afraid. At least to Naruto, Noa was his precious little brother and not a monster. Most of the time, as long as the twins stayed together, Noa was fine.

But the dreams. Always the damn dreams.

_(Fire and hate and burning red eyes-)_

_(long dark hair, whipping wildly in the howling wind, red eyes filled with madness, hands covered in thick, hot blood-)_

_(blonde hair, sorrowful, heartbroken blue eyes, golden chakra cloak-)_

_(why did you do it, tell me,_ brother _?)_

_(because they deserved it! don't you see Naruto!)_

_( **I waNt ThEm aLl tO DIE.**_)


	4. Chapter 4

'Hey, Noa?'

'Hmmm?'

'Why do you think everyone hates us so much?'

'I don't know, 'cause we're orphans?'

'But that's stupid!'

' _People_ are stupid.'

'...'

'...'

'It might be our parents.'

'Our parents?

'Maybe they were bad guys and _that's_ why everyone hates us.'

'Maybe.'

* * *

The day after their most recent grocery trip failure, the raven refused to leave the apartment for several days in a row. There were dark circles under his eyes and he adamantly refused to eat, instead offering his portions of their meagre meals to his twin. After a couple of days more of this, Naruto pulled Noa out of their apartment. He kept tugging at his arm insistently until he followed. Noa looked steadily more and more uncomfortable as they went. They passed street after street, for what seemed like forever, until Naruto finally seemed to get where he was going.

When the blonde steered them towards a ramen stand, Noa paled. He leaned over to hiss a frantic question in his brother's ear. Naruto only smiled brightly in reply.

'It's okay, Noa, they're cool!'

'Who is?!'

Before Naruto could answer, they were already at Ichiraku Ramen.

Noa shook as they approached the ramen stand, sending nervous glances towards the shopkeeper. Strangely enough, he raised no objections to them entering. There was no shouting for them to "Get Out!", no threats, no anger. Nothing. He just waved them over with a smile and asked what they wanted to order. The anticipatory terror in Noa slowly melted away into confusion. Why was this man being so nice?

Before long, both the twins were sitting with large bowls of steaming ramen in front of them. Noa stared at the bowl with slight suspicion, before glancing at his brother. The blonde was eating with gusto. The raven looked back at his own bowl and cautiously tried some. With a look of almost comical astonishment, Noa blinked at the ramen bowl before he continued to eat, this time with more open enthusiasm.

* * *

He didn't chase us out...

_Why? I thought..._

**It's a trick! It has to be!**

_I don't understand..._

At least one person other than our brother likes us. That's good, right?

**Just because he tolerates our presence doesn't mean he likes us!**

_I thought everybody..._

We should be positive.

**That never got us anywhere before!**

It works for Naruto!

**Yeah, well, he's different!**

* * *

The voices were growing louder and more insistent with each passing day. They blended into Noa's every thought with a terrifying ease. Before long, he could barely tell the difference between his own thoughts and that of the voices. Or maybe there had never been a difference to begin with... Whatever the reason, it was a problem. A problem that was getting out of control, fast.

Noa was in the kitchen at night (again) when it happened.

He staring at the water in his cup, eyes unfocused and distant. For a beat, all was silent. Then, all of a sudden, the three voices began to howl. He gasped out loud, a fierce pain stabbing through his mind.

'Wha-what-'

It had never hurt before. _Never._

The turning gears in his brain came to a sudden, screeching halt.

**Do it! Do it, Noa!**

_They deserve it._

_Noa, Noa, Noa_

**Noa, Noa, Noa**

_**Noa, Noa, Noa** _

Don't listen to them, Noa!

'Shut up!' the boy screamed, covering his ears with both hands as tears of rage and frustration streamed down his face. He stumbled off the chair, collapsing onto his knees in the middle of the room. His breath came in ragged pants, waves of blinding pain throbbing in his head.

'All of you! Just shut up... leave me alone...'

**Why so sad, Noa?**

_Why so miserable?_

Why so tired all the time?

He couldn't even make out the words anymore. Nothing made sense, it was disjointed and distorted. The three separate voices blended and mashed together in a twisted, unsettling way and made a terrible, mad chorus in the boy's exhausted mind. It was like nothing he had ever felt before. His head spun.

**_Why so tired, why so sad, why so miserable? Why the anger and the tears? Why the constant lies? Don't you care? Have you ever cared?_ **

'I need help...' Noa whimpered.

(He was so tired of this.)

_**Yes, you do Noa. Yes you do.** _

He was curled up in a tight ball, hands over his ears. All alone in the dark, dark room.

* * *

'Hey, Naruto...' Noa began over breakfast, uncertainty coating his tone. His eyes flicked down.

Naruto looked at his twin, head tilted in curiosity. There was a concerned glint in his eyes.

'Noa?' Naruto asked, frowning. 'Is something wrong?'

Noa avoided looking at him, heart thumping in chest. Why was this so hard?! All he had to do was tell him. He had never even meant to keep this a secret. It was just hard to find a way to bring it up.

Naruto's eyes narrowed. He had always had something of a sixth sense when it came to the younger twin. Maybe it was because they knew each other inside out, but the blonde was the only one who could gauge his darker-haired brother's moods with complete accuracy. Other saw only a tiny, scowling child and either yelled at him or gave him a very wide, very obvious, berth. Sometimes it was useful, sometimes annoying. Mostly? It was just straight up terrifying. Knowing someone can read you like a book is never a pleasant thing to know after all. Even if they're the person you trust absolutely.

'You've been actin' weird lately...' he said slowly, staring at the raven expectantly.

He stayed silent, throat dry.

Naruto continued to stare, frown slowly deepening.

The raven-haired twin steeled himself with a clench of his fists. It was now or never.

(Noa was ridiculously nervous.)

'I need to tell you something.'


	5. Chapter 5

**Light needs Darkness. Darkness needs Light. If one is taken away, the other does not live.** **It is a simple statement and a simple truth. One that will go unacknowledged for quite some time.**

**Pity. Maybe if they had known, something could have been salvaged from the ashes of the fire that would burn the village of Hidden Leaf. Or maybe the fire could have put out, or prevented before it began.**

**But they chose to be wilfully blind.**

_**And everyone will suffer for it.** _

* * *

'I need to tell you something.'

When his twin looked at him, eyes anxious, voice hesitant, Naruto knew something serious was going on. Noa was never that terrified, not with _him._ And looking at him right now? It was undeniably terror that he felt.

Naruto frowned. Noa should never feel terrified. Especially not around him.

Bright sapphire eyes stared into crimson red ones, expectant.

Noa bit his lip and fiddled with his hands, dropping the intense eye contact and looking into the distance. The blonde tugged at his sleeve insistently. And then... Noa began to speak. Slowly, in stumbling, unsure words, the whole grim tale came pouring out. When it was done, the raven-haired twin cringed and shrivelled in on himself.

'I'm- I'm sorry, I-'

'I don't care about that!' Naruto declared, still frowning, but this time, for a different reason entirely.

Crimson ruby eyes widened.

'You're my _brother._ '

There was complete, unwavering certainty in the young blonde's voice as he said this, along with the belief that that one statement explained everything.

Noa smiled tremulously, his whole body shaking with relief. Naruto beamed back at him, unruffled in the least by what he just found out.

...and you know what?

Maybe it did.

* * *

_**That was the day the twins' fates changed.** _

* * *

Although the young Uzumaki twins did not know it, their clan had once had a curse put on them. It was a very old curse, passed through their very blood. So old, in fact, that many Uzumaki had long stopped thinking about it. And with the clan's near-total extermination, there was no one _left_ to pass on the warning. For, the curse had chosen to manifest in one of the two Kyuubi Jinchuuriki.

It was a very dangerous, volatile curse that burned through his blood and chakra network, melding with his very being. But melding in a sloppy, halfway-there fashion. Instead of fusing with the young Uzumaki, it manifested in a... slightly unique way. It was this curse that ended up being the catalyst for a lot of future events, and the reason that a lot of things changed drastically from their original course.

Let's take a look at how this happened. It all started with one little, seemingly inconsequential piece of information reaching the wrong ears. The ears of a rich ambitious woman who lacked any kind of intelligence or foresight. She put in an order using her wealth and influence and unknowingly set the stage for an event that would shake the Elemental Nations to their very core.

* * *

One very ordinary day, Naruto and Noa were out on the outskirts of the village. Now, normally they would never be out so far, but the pair had been playing together and got too absorbed in their game. After all, it was a rare day indeed when Noa decided to brave the streets of Konoha with his brother. Mostly, he preferred to stay hidden from the public eye. But after their little heart-to-heart over breakfast, Naruto had begged and pleaded for his twin to come play with him outside. Noa had no desire to refuse, not after his biggest fears had just been put to rest.

So they had played and they had ran far, far away from their apartment and it was late afternoon already. It was growing dark outside. Neither of the twins liked to be out so late. They walked with their hands tightly clasped, tense and afraid.

So small. So afraid. So... _alone._

Cold sweat poured down Noa's forehead.

I don't like this,' he confessed, walking even closer to Naruto. '-it's too quiet. And so empty...'

Naruto shivered, eyes flickering over the shadows all around them. There were so very many shadows...

The children walked in increasingly unsettling silence, tense and vigilant. There was an odd sort of feeling in the air. An ominous chill. Bitter wind plucked at their clothes and through their hair. And, inexplicably, they got the feeling that something... no, someONE... was watching. Their. Every. Move.

'Let's go _home,_ Naruto,' Noa insisted, growing increasingly anxious.

_Something's wrong... someone's watching,_

**Get back home, run, need to RUN-**

We need to get home. NOW.

_Noa-_

**Noa-**

Noa-

* * *

'Look!'

'What?'

'There!'

'I don't- _ooooh.'_

'So. Cool.'

'Yeah, I guess.'

'I have to go take a look!'

'Wait, what?'

'You can wait here if you want! I'll run ahead, okay?'

'Naruto, wait-'

* * *

Noa cringed, staggering into a wall. His head ached and throbbed and spun. He closed his eyes and propped himself up on the cool stone of the wall. The odd sense of urgency hadn't left him. In fact, it had only gotten worse. And he could no longer feel Naruto's presence at his side, there was no warm hand clutching his. That, more than anything, was what alarmed him.

What had happened to him?

Why was he all alone?

Where was his twin?

And where... was _he?_

_NOA!_

**NOA RUN!**

_**RUN!** _

A voice, spoke from somewhere behind him, cold cold and clinical.

'Target located. Retrieving now.'

Hands grabbed him round the waist, big, rough hands. Noa felt himself be swung onto a broad shoulder, hanging lifelessly. The fog in his brain had spread rapidly into the rest of his body, rendering him weak and immobile. Caught. Helpless.

Before he blacked out completely, one last thought pierced through his mind.

_"Naruto... help... me..."_

Crimson ruby eyes fluttered weakly before closing.

Noa Uzumaki knew no more.


	6. Chapter 6

Later, years and years later, whenever Naruto looked back on that fateful day, no matter how hard he tried, he could not remember much of it. All he could tell for certain was that he and Noa had gotten separated somehow and when he returned, his twin was gone. The rest was lost to a haze of pain, rage and desperation. His twin was his lifeline; his one and only precious person; his very existence. Without Noa, life was not worth living. He could remember running, following, all thought squashed out by horror and the soul-deep sense of loss.

The next time his memory becomes clear is when he stumbles into an enemy base, ragged and tired and tiny. So very very tiny when compared to the adult ninja surrounding him. He could remember screaming. He could remembered choking back tears. He could remember seeing his brother strapped to a table, crimson red eyes wet with tears, screaming through his gag. He could remember the words, clear as day.

_"Save me, save me, save me."_

Noa repeated those two words over and over, wild with panic and pain.

Naruto lunged forward. His vison was clouded with red, eyes glowing the same colour. There was yet more pain, bruises and blood and broken bones.

A stranger's voice cut through the room.

' _What_ are you doing to those kids?!'

And then, all he knew was darkness.

* * *

It was a passing rogue ninja that saved them.

Much of that day was made unclear with the drugs pumping through Noa's system and the desperation eclipsing Naruto's good sense, but that much, at least, was certain. By sheer, impossible coincidence, he just so happened to be passing through the area and heard the screams of two children. By even more impossible luck, he was compassionate enough and skilled enough to bust them out, leaving no one else alive. Come to think of it, out of everything that's ever happened to them, that was by far the most unlikely. They had never been that fortunate before after all.

And wasn't that the damnedest thing? What saved them was _luck._

Not skill.

Not power.

Not forethought.

Certainly not their village.

The twins had gotten very, very lucky indeed. That was all there was to it. Noa had been kidnapped, kami knew why, Naruto hared off to save him and nearly got himself captured in the process. But that was the closest call either of them would have. Never again would the Uzumaki twins be so defenceless and dependent on someone else's mercy. (they made sure of that) After all, who on earth would show mercy to the demons they so hated?

* * *

Noa blinked blearily as the world came back into focus.

'Wha-' he muttered, throat desert-dry. He coughed, a hacking wheezing sound, before continuing to speak shakily.

'What... happened...?'

'You're finally awake.'

The boy jerked, whirling his head to stare at the source of the voice. And instantly regretted it, as pain bloomed in his sore, throbbing body. He gasped, tears gathering in his eyes.

Immediately, hands cloaked in soothing chakra came near. The relief was instantaneous; Noa's eyes fluttered shut and he breathed out.

'Be careful, you're still not fully healed yet.' the voice gently reminded.

Noa reluctantly nodded, not daring to open his eyes in case the nice dream flowed away too soon. (It wouldn't be the first time.)

Then he remembered-

_kidnapping, drugs, enemy ninja, NARUTO_

_-_ and sat bolt upright, on high alert, despite every inch in his body screaming in protest.

'What _happened?'_ he demanded, staring at the man in front of him.

The man was lean and not particularly tall, salad-green hair framing his face, with its honey-coloured skin and orange-gold eyes. There were scars on his hands and wrists, whole sections of skin burned a raw scarlet. Even despite that, he was strangely pretty, like a wood spirit in the battered old books Noa read. He was an odd mixture of soft lines and hard features, by far the most telling of which was the way he held himself, taught and tense, always ready to move. What drew Noa's eyes the most however, was the forehead protector with a line scratched through it.

A ninja.

A _rogue_ ninja.

'Who are you?' Noa asked warily.

The man smiled; a smile so soft and gentle that something in the boy's heart twinged painfully.

'Nobody.'

The rogue ninja escorted the twins back to Konoha over the course of the next several days. Despite all their reservations, he didn't even touch them beyond what was necessary for healing and making sure they didn't fall behind on the journey. A stark contrast to both the enemy ninja and almost everybody else they'd ever met. Noa and Naruto had exchanged many, many puzzled looks behind his back.

'Why'd you save us?' Naruto piped up one day, bold as usual. Noa stayed quiet and watchful, as eager as his twin to know the answer.

The man hesitated briefly before replying simply with:

'Why not? You needed help.'

Noa sucked in a sharp breath, exchanging yet another startled glance with Naruto.

For once in a long time, the cynical, cold voices to the dark thoughts in his head were silent.

* * *

Before they knew it, the journey back was over and they were at Konoha's gates. Silently, Noa grabbed Naruto's hand and gripped it tight between them. Naruto only stepped closer, a warm, reassuring presence at his side. They had a lot to talk about and process, once the shock had finally worn off and exhaustion and their wounds were no longer wearing them down. But before that, they needed to say goodbye.

With that innate understanding that had always existed between them, the twins turned around to face their saviour. Naruto opened his mouth to speak-

-but there was nobody there. Only the wind, whispering its wordless song.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this chapter is shorter than usual, I just needed to get this out quickly.

It was night time.

Naruto Uzumaki could not sleep.

He tossed and he turned and he shoved the pillow over his head and tried to _force_ himself to sleep-

Nothing worked.

In the end, he sighed and gave up. Padding barefoot across the dark corridors, shivering in his thin clothes, Naruto eventually came to his destination: the kitchen. There, just as he had suspected, sat his twin. The dark-haired boy seemed particularly out of it tonight, staring glassy-eyed at the wood of the table. There was a glass of water in front him, perfectly pristine. Another sleepless night. This time, for both of the twins.

Wordlessly, Naruto joined Noa at the table, pressing himself close. He closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of his twin's body, his quiet breathing.

Noa was alive. _Noa was ALIVE._

Relief still buzzed in his veins, mixing with adrenaline and rage and the sharp spike of shame.

Noa was alive, but that was not because of anything Naruto did. He had nearly been cut open then and there, right in front of him, and _Naruto had done nothing to stop it._

He had nearly lost his twin.

He had been useless.

Noa had almost- he had almost-

The prospect of losing his twin was too horrible to even think about. A great, yawning chasm opened in his heart whenever he tried to. A bottomless pit of loneliness and despair and _whywhywhy-_

Naruto did not realise he was crying until a familiar small hand touched his wet cheek.

'What's wrong?' his lovely, wonderful twin asked softly, red eyes stormy with concern.

Naruto opened his mouth to speak.

'Y-you- I-'

He only managed to get two words out, gasping wetly and shuddering, before he collapsed into open sobbing. Immediately, he felt Noa pressing closer, wrapping his small arms around the blonde's bony shoulders. Naruto gratefully melted into the embrace, breathing in the delightful alive-ness of the other. They stayed like that for what seemed like forever, long after Naruto's sobs subsided. Neither felt much like letting go, then or ever.

'We're never going to be separated again,' Noa whispered into the dark. He pulled back from their hug, eyes intent, staring directly into Naruto's.

Naruto nodded back at him, a stubborn, steely glint in those blue eyes.

'Never ever again.' he said.

It felt like a promise.

* * *

The twins' promise rang fresh in their heads the next morning. Somehow, it seemed like the single most important thing to come out of that particular debacle. Neither of them had been surprised that nobody had come to save them after all. The entire village would have sold them for a pile of shit if they could. No, that was not a surprise in the slightest. Their helplessness was frustrating, as well as dangerous, but it could be rectified with lots and lots of training time.

But they would not be separated like that again. Never.

That promise was their single biggest motivator for what was to come. And the first indicator of just how spectacularly Konoha had fucked up.

In another world, in another timeline, where Naruto Uzumaki was born alone and stayed alone, his biggest motivator was the sheer, overwhelming loneliness burning away at his core. All would be forgiven and no one would be held accountable for their mistakes, for his heart was too big to hold on to a grudge. But this is not that world and not that timeline.

The life of a jinchuuriki is that of a human sacrifice, a weapon made to be despised and hated and alone. Naruto Uzumaki had dealt with it and made peace with the inherent unfairness of his role in one world and he would do so in this one.

But Noa Uzumaki is nothing like his twin.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The word 'love' is used purely in the familial sense. There is NO incest in this story.

When the Uzumaki twins first entered the Ninja Academy, it was not as the naïve, hopeful, broken children as all were sure they would be. The Academy teachers watched, many resentful and malicious, looking for an excuse to tear them down. The other students watched with either curiosity or indifference. Most, if not all, had been warned away from the twins by their parents. Fear, indifference or outright hate faced the two at every turn.

_"My mum told me they're bad news!"_

_"Look at them. Those demons."_

_"Wrong! Try that again, you pathetic brat!"_

However, much to everybody's surprise, all insults and unfair treatment seemed to roll off them like water off a duck's back. The reason for this was simple: neither of the twins paid much attention to outsiders, which for them? Was absolutely everyone. They were Naruto-and-Noa, Noa-and-Naruto. Where one was, the other was also. To Noa, all other than Naruto were the enemy. To Naruto, all other than Noa were unimportant, barely a blip on his radar.

But, however close their relationship, they were not the same. There was one vital difference in the twins' attitudes. And one particular incident solidified this difference for everyone.

It happened during a training match.

One day, a civilian girl called Sasaki bumped into Naruto in an empty corridor. Had it been anyone other than him (or his twin) she would have apologised and walked away. As it was...

Sasaki scowled and thrust her hands out violently, throwing him off balance.

'Get away from me, you freak!' she cried and stomped away.

With barely a twitch of the eyelids, Naruto got up, dusted himself off and carried on.

But there was one other witness. Noa, who stopped dead, the bland indifference on his face contorting briefly to wild rage. His eyes narrowed, his fists clenched and he stared after Sasaki. For once the voices in his head blended completely, wholly, together as they spoke in unison:

_**DESTROY HER.** _

And destroy her he did.

During taijutsu training, he and Sasaki were paired up for a sparring match. It was a little while after the incident in the corridor, both Naruto and Sasaki had forgotten completely about it by then. But Noa had not. That incident was burned into his memory, the last straw in a number of similar 'accidents'. Poor Sasaki had just been the latest, most convenient, the easiest to punish. After all, Noa was not his brother, he was not kind and he was not forgiving and he was not, he was not, _he was not._

Something stirred in his gut, inside his body.

A fox's eye opened.

Nine tails swished from side to side.

**Do it Noa.**

_Do it._

The raven-haired twin whirled into a motion, silent and swift. A blur of careful, controlled moves and truly intimidating stamina. It was something both twins had in common, when one of them really got going, nothing could keep them down. Especially not barely-trained, spoiled, _soft_ kids. Sasaki tried desperately to keep up, but in the end she was a lazy, normal civilian girl. Untrained. Unbothered.

And Noa was a jinchuuriki, with all the healing benefits of one.

The entire class watched in horrified, fascinated silence.

Swish. Slap. Crunch.

Swish. Slap. Crunch.

By the time the red haze receded from his field of vision, the match was long since won. Noa stood, fists clenched, above Sasaki. She was beaten and bruised, trembling and clutching at herself. Noa watched with sick satisfaction as she hurried away and stumbled. With a loud crunch, she fell on her side, landing on top of her arm. Sasaki burst into loud, noisy tears as she sat up, nursing her broken arm. The teacher hurried to soothe her, with a quick glare at him.

Noa did not care.

The tension in his chest had fallen away, replaced by elation. His eyes were alight with excitement, blood rushing in his ears. He no longer saw or heard anything around him. There was only the adrenaline in his veins, the wild joy in his heart. The entire outside world had ceased to exist, and the only thing going through his head was:

_That felt so good._

* * *

Naruto cheered and congratulated his sibling as soon as Noa came into his vicinity. He rewarded his twin with a bright, beaming smile, only it was softer somehow, more geniune.

'That was so cool!'

Noa smiled back, shy and pleased.

'Looks like all that extra training is really paying off,' he commented quietly as stood near his twin.

'Watch me,' Naruto demanded. 'I'll do even better than I did last time!'

Noa nodded and settled back to watch as Naruto began his sparring match.

If the blonde noticed anything different about the look in his eyes, he didn't comment.

* * *

The twins were always together, always close and closed-off. Naruto could read all his brother's moods with a single once-over, Noa could always tell when Naruto's exuberance was an extra layer of fake. They knew each other's tells off by heart. The two of them had their own little world, and nobody else was welcome. Not anymore.

Naruto-and-Noa. Noa-and-Naruto.

As long as they had each other, what did anything else matter?

As long as they had each other, what did any _one_ else matter?

Where Noa thought, Naruto did. Where Naruto was unstoppable, Noa was immovable. Where Noa was uncaring, Naruto was unreasonable. Where Naruto repressed, Noa spiralled. They were not a balance, they were sugar and water, fire and oxygen. A perfect complement, in all the wrong ways. _So_ wrong, positively twisted and yet ideal for each other at the same time.

Two broken children, who had found love only in each other. Halves of the same whole. Merely a pair of twins who loved each other...

Just a little too much.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Sorry for another shorter chapter, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

When Noa had first told Naruto of the voices and his dreams, he had expected an entirely different reaction. After all, he had kept such a massive secret from his twin for so long.

Noa had always been able to feel the souls of others through their chakra. After all, everybody had chakra, including civilians. Most just weren't able to access it unless trained, or had too small an amount to be used for anything. But a person's chakra held the imprint of their personality, their experiences and feelings. Although those with sensory abilities were able to _feel_ chakra and those with dojutsu such as Byakugan were _see_ chakra, none could perceive the soul through it quite as clearly and fully as Noa Uzumaki. And the reason for that was simple: Noa Uzumaki was cursed.

No one knew when it happened, or even what the curse was except for the Uzumaki themselves. And since they were now gone, the twins had no idea what had happened to Noa, and subsequently, to Naruto. It was an odd development, but not in itself a bad one. After all, the twins had hit the jackpot when it came to Ninja abilities and genes, it was just neither of them knew it quite yet. The rather unique circumstances of their birth were another reason for Noa's sixth sense and Naruto's newly-expanded ability roster.

But they would know all of that later. For now, the Uzumaki brothers were just kids with a goal in mind and a promise in their hearts.

The evening after the fight with Sasaki, Naruto and Noa had a talk.

'So... something changed.'

Naruto looked at Noa, expression serious.

'Sasaki, right?'

Noa nodded, a thoughtful look on his face. He leaned back in his chair, staring into the wall.

'I had no idea the world could be so... quiet.' he admitted. 'I could finally hear myself think.'

'Fighting makes ya feel better?' Naruto clarified after a moments thought.

'Yeah...' Noa said quietly, a hand clutching at his chest, right above his heart. 'It wasn't totally gone, but... better.'

The miasma of hate and fear and rage that he had violently repressed and pushed away since he could understand what it was... It was quiet. Dulled. The terrible voices that echoed it were beautifully, absolutely, silent.

He finally knew how to switch that painful sixth sense _off._

But while the younger Uzumaki was drifting in his own thoughts, the older had a look of grim, steely determination on his face. He was wearing the same face he did when he was planning something big. And something very dangerous.

_(Maybe it was a good thing that Noa hadn't noticed the change in Naruto's demeanour.)_

* * *

If one asked Naruto about his current life's dream, he would say: "Protecting Noa". It was really the only thing he wanted. Protecting his brother wasn't exactly all that concrete a _goal_ though, it was more like a general desire than anything. Which left him with only one clear objective: to get stronger, strong enough to protect his brother from any threat, because getting separated from him once had been bad enough. He didn't think he could survive a second time.

So when Noa had confided in him that day, when he began to train himself to withstand his sixth sense, Naruto made a second promise. This time to himself.

_I'll protect him._

_No matter what it takes._

Which at the moment meant pushing himself to the absolute limits. Training as hard as he could. And there was something his twin said that was nagging at him, refusing to leave him alone.

_"Naruto, I can feel somebody else's chakra inside of us. It's not like anything else I've felt before... It's so dark..."_

_"I can hear its voice sometimes. All the time... so full of hate..."_

It was just a stray thought, a suspicion taking root. But sometimes, all it took was just one thought to change the course of destiny. The beginnings of a plan formed in Naruto's mind. No matter how outlandish the possibility seemed, there was a chance, and for Naruto one single chance was all he ever needed anyway.


End file.
